Who Killed Russell Wilson And Then Jumped Inside His Body To Continue His Legacy?

by Tommy Gimler This dude still looks a lot like Russell Wilson, but he all of sudden sounds a lot like the rapper Future giving an interview after ingesting a fuck-ton of edibles. More »

Somebody Dropped Some Major Ass On The Sixers Bench Last Night

by Tommy Gimler The NBA postseason apparently makes some players more nervous than others. More »

What If You Could Wait Until 3 Weeks Of MLB Games Were Played Before Betting On Win Totals?

by Tommy Gimler The Boston Red Sox under is suddenly looking tastier than one of Tito’s tacos. More »

Yu Darvish, Who Sucks, Took Out Three People With One Terrible 99-MPH Fastball

by Tommy Gimler Better teach this kid some control before he kills somebody. More »

 

The 5 Best Lines From Yesterday’s Amazing Bleacher Report Article On The Dysfunctional Green Bay Packers

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by Tommy Gimler

The NFL’s trendiest storyline in 2019? You guessed it – massages.

Behold The Most Disturbing Tweet We Have Ever Seen

First Take - January 24, 2018

by Tommy Gimler

This is just utterly and preposterously ridiculous.

Channing Frye Said His #1 Takeaway From Playing With LeBron Was The King’s ‘Smelly Breath’

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by Tommy Gimler

And what did LeBron have to say when asked about Channing Frye? You guessed it – “Who the hell is that?”

Breaking News: Brewers OF Christian Yelich Out For The Season After Breaking Tibia And Fibula Sliding Into Outfield Wall

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by Tommy Gimler

Milwaukee’s Christian Yelich can still plow my sister, but he won’t be humping anything other than a bottle of Vicodin after the crushing news that he broke his leg in several places during Monday night’s game against Cincinnati.

This Tweet About Jason Witten Is The Funniest Thing We’ve Seen Since He Joined The MNF Booth

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by Tommy Gimler

He’s got no more hair, brah.

Here’s Every MLB Team’s 2019 Season Prediction In Just One Sentence

all rise

by Tommy Gimler

Here’s the perfect article if you only have five minutes to get ready for baseball.

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