5 Bold Predictions For The 2016 World Series

by Tommy Gimler It’s been 19 years since that turd Jose Mesa couldn’t get three outs in the bottom of the ninth inning in Game 7 for the Tribe, and the last time the Cubs played in a World Series, all professional baseball players were white. Starting tonight, something’s gotta give. More »

Reason #13 Why NFL Ratings Are Down: Seattle 6, Arizona 6

by Frank Rhombus If you’re a fan of offensive plays that don’t make it past the line of scrimmage and missed chip-shot field goals, oh baby, then last night was a humdinger for you. More »

Might Be Able To Buy Hooker For New House Thanks To These NFL And NCAA Football Bets This Weekend, Bro

by Rakesh the Intern Should be weekend of fat points in this college football game, like Uncle Rishabh fat. Dude is like 400-pounder now, bro. More »

Charlie Sheen Wants To Throw A First Pitch At The World Series And That Sounds Like Something That Should Happen

by Tommy Gimler I mean, why not? After all, we’re told he matured a lot over the winter. Apparently he’s bathing now. More »

John Lackey Always Has Been, Still Is And Always Will Be A Gigantic Turd

by Tommy Gimler All is right on the North Side today, as the beloved Chicago Cubs curb stomped the Los Angeles Dodgers 10-2 in Game 4 of the NLCS last night, knotting the series at two games apiece. More »


Stay On The Sidelines, Romo


by Will Kay

Few quarterbacks in the last ten years have been as polarizing as Tony Romo.

Bills Mafia Bros Are Now Drinking Beers Out Of Girls’ Assholes

bills mafia butt luge

by Frank Rhombus

I mean, I’ll venture a guess that it tastes a lot better than if they’re doing it out of their uncles’ balloon knots.

Fox Sports Has Been Photoshopping Sam Bradford’s Head On Teddy Bridgewater’s Body This Year


by Tommy Gimler

Oh, so that‘s why Bradford doesn’t suck balls this year. It’s really just Teddy Bridgewater wearing a Sam Bradford mask. Got it.

Three Things To Do As A Browns Fan Other Than Kill Yourself


by Tommy Gimler

If you’re in Cleveland and rooting for the Browns – and only the Browns – may God have mercy on your soul.

Can’t Miss Making Bookie Your Bitch Betting On NFL And College Football This Weekend, Bro

eli manning blows

by Rakesh the Intern

If you bet everything you own on my college bets last week, let me know what overpass you are sleeping under and I will bring you free juice box. Sorry about that, bro.

R.I.P. Tristan Thompson’s Career Now That He And Khloe Kardashian Are Exclusive

khloe kardashian tristan thompson

by Frank Rhombus

Plowing a Kardashian is bad for your health. It’s science.

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