Category Archives: NHL

A Tampa Bay-Anaheim Stanley Cup Finals Matchup Would Suck Balls

tampa bay lightning new york rangers game 7

by Tommy Gimler

Thank the fuck Christ that the Rangers decided to show up last night to force a Game 7 in the Eastern Conference finals, or we’d be halfway to a Stanley Cup final that would be about as sexy as Melissa McCarthy looking under her bed for the chunk of Cinnabon she dropped there last Tuesday.

The Minnesota Wild Are Almost As Embarrassing As This Security Guard Who Passed Out With His Cock Out

patrick kane against the wild

by Tommy Gimler

The Minnesota Wild suddenly find themselves in a 3-0 hole against the Chicago Blackhawks after losing 1-0 tonight on their home ice. Just how bad are things for Minnesota? Well, Patrick Kane, who is currently third on the list of guys who can plow my sister, has just as many goals as the entire Wild team in the series.

New York’s NBC Affiliate Thinks Islanders-Capitals Series Could Go To A Game 8

islanders game 8

by Frank Rhombus

What happens when you put a broad who doesn’t know jack shit about sports and/or an ITT Tech graduate in charge of the graphics for your television station’s sports team?

The Blacks Won Tonight

blacks win

by Frank Rhombus

Here’s a headline that sure as shit didn’t come from a Baltimore news station.

When A Cop Asks If That’s Cocaine, You Say ‘NO!’

jarret stoll cocaine arrest

by Andy Ostroff

You’ve got to be some special sort of douchebag to get caught with cocaine at a Las Vegas cocaine – um, I mean – pool party.

The Nashville Predators Fan Base Is So Pathetic Their Team Had To Leave Them ‘Rules Of The Game’ Cards

nashville predators rules of the game cards

by Tommy Gimler

Hey, we’re not pretending to know a shit ton about hockey, but this is pathetic.

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