Category Archives: Seattle Seahawks

Who Killed Russell Wilson And Then Jumped Inside His Body To Continue His Legacy?

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by Tommy Gimler

This dude still looks a lot like Russell Wilson, but he all of sudden sounds a lot like the rapper Future giving an interview after ingesting a fuck-ton of edibles.

Sometimes You Bet $569K On The Seahawks To Beat A 3-10 Team And You Take It Up The Tailpipe When They Lose In OT

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by Tommy Gimler

Dick. Fucking. Sandwich.

2018 NFC West Preview: 49ers Fans Are Dreaming Of A Season Bigger Than Jimmy Garoppolo’s Girl’s Boobs

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by Tommy Gimler

Believe it or not, the Rams’ road to the top of the NFC West this year isn’t as easy as bedding Alyssa Milano if you’re a pro baseball player.

Is It Me Or Is Michael Bennett One Giant Bag Of Shit?

NFL: Preseason-Minnesota Vikings at Seattle Seahawks

by Frank Rhombus

If you’re still looking to get either of the Bennett brothers a Christmas gift for some reason, a mesh bag of dicks seems appropriate this year.

NFL Wild Card Weekend Is Perfect Time To Destroy Bookie With These Bets, Bro

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by Rakesh the Intern

Happy New Year, bro! Let’s make it a year where we tear bookie’s asshole to pieces with these can’t miss bets on this silly game of American football, my friend!

Reason #13 Why NFL Ratings Are Down: Seattle 6, Arizona 6

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by Frank Rhombus

If you’re a fan of offensive plays that don’t make it past the line of scrimmage and missed chip-shot field goals, oh baby, then last night was a humdinger for you.

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