Category Archives: Houston Texans

Here Are My AFC South Predictions, Bro

no beard andrew luck

by Rakesh the Intern

NFL season start in like 90 minute, and boss is like, “Hey, Rakesh. How about an AFC South preview?” I want to tell him to go fuck self, but I am big pussy so I say, “OK, boss.”

Hey, Jadeveon Clowney. Nick Saban Might Be ‘Nothing But 5-5,’ But At Least He’s Not A Huge Pussy Like You

jadeveon clowney huge pussy

by Frank Rhombus

There are many professional athletes and coaches whose play and decision-making on the field buys them some freedom to say whatever they want about other players and coaches. Jadeveon Clowney is not one of those guys.

Shit Of Holy, Bro! It Is Time To Take Peak At 2014 AFC Over/Unders, My Friend

raiders fans

by Rakesh the Intern

I’m telling you, bro. You take away severe public urination problem and fact that everyone in my extended family smell like bad cheese from goat, and the summer away from America here in Howrah really is not too much of problem, bro. And apparently this sports blog has yet to matter in lives of enough Americans, so it look like my boss will have me writing about betting on American football without paying of money to me for doing so, my friend.

The DUD NFL Midseason Report: AFC

Kansas City Chiefs

by Tommy Gimler

After finishing the 2012 campaign with an NFL-worst 2-14 record, this year’s Kansas City Chiefs are the lone unbeaten team, sitting atop the AFC West with a 9-0 record. If you called that, you’re a fucking liar.

Investing Stock In Athletes, Hey? You’ll Want To Stay Away From These Clowns

arian foster

by Tommy Gimler

Just when your fat ass thought the marketing and branding of professional athletes had finally hit its peak, the folks at Fantex Holdings come along and take it to a whole new level, offering stock in athletes in which the value depends solely on their economic success. Sign a huge contract? Cha-ching. Get a deal with Coca-Cola? Straight cash, homey. Get busted for masturbating in front of a girl after you ask to borrow her pen? Uh oh.

The Last Time A Texans Quarterback Did NOT Throw A Pick Six In A Game…

matt schaub sucks dick this year

by Tommy Gimler

The Houston Texans’ 2013 season can pretty much be summed up with one word: fuck.

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