All the Baltimore Ravens posts:

Who Is The Most Annoying Professional Athlete?

Published by tgim on February 5th, 2013

by Tommy Gimler

ESPN is giving you yet another reason to locate the mute button on your remote. Now that he has played his last NFL game, Ray Lewis will be joining the four-letter as an analyst, meaning he’ll instantly become the second most unintelligible former player on your television next to Shannon Sharpe. But now that the most annoying player in American professional sports has called it quits, who is out there to take the crown from Lewis? Well, not take. They’ll have to ask nicely so he doesn’t stab them. Anyway, The DUD is here to break that down. (more…)

1 Comment »
Posted in AFC East, AFC North, AL East, Baltimore Ravens, MLB, NBA, New England Patriots, New York Yankees, NFL, San Antonio Spurs, Southwest
Tags: , ,

Who Will Be The Next Not Elite Quarterback To Say He’s Elite And Then Win A Super Bowl?

Published by tgim on February 4th, 2013

by Tommy Gimler

In what is becoming almost as big of a trend in the NFL as driving while intoxicated, slightly above-average quarterbacks are telling the football world that they are much better than that, even going as far as calling themselves elite, and then proving they actually are with a Super Bowl victory. Last year it was Eli Manning. This year, Joe Flacco. So, who’s next? Here’s a hint: Since we’re talking about slightly above-average quarterbacks, it’s not Mark Sanchez because he is just terrible. (more…)

1 Comment »
Posted in AFC North, AFC South, Atlanta Falcons, Baltimore Ravens, Cincinnati Bengals, Houston Texans, NFC South, NFC West, San Francisco 49ers
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

The DUD Super Bowl Prop Sheet – Win $50, Bro

Published by rakesh on February 3rd, 2013

by Rakesh The Intern

Check it out, bro. I still do unpaid internship at this American sports blog, but my boss say, “Hey, Rakesh. If you can beat every one of our readers on our Super Bowl Prop Sheet, then you get fifty bucks. But whoever get high score, they win fifty bucks.” Since last time I got fifty bucks I had to eat fourteen testicles from elephant with Downs, I say no problem, bro. (more…)

25 Comments »
Posted in AFC North, Baltimore Ravens, Crap, NFC West, NFL, San Francisco 49ers
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Who Has The More Impressive Rap Sheet, Baltimore or San Francisco?

Published by tgim on February 2nd, 2013

by Tommy Gimler

From what we’ve read online and watched on television this week, Super Bowl XLVII should be tighter than Lolo Jones’ fish mitten. So before I’m placing any bets on the big game, I’m looking for any edge I can get. I decided that whichever team fights the hardest and does whatever it takes to get what they want despite the consequences that will follow, that’s the team that will be victorious. And to determine which team will do that, I turned to each roster’s arrest records. And let’s just say that if these two teams were to put their arrest records up against each other tomorrow, the game would be more lopsided than Tara Reid’s fake fun bags. (more…)

1 Comment »
Posted in AFC North, Baltimore Ravens, NFC West, NFL, San Francisco 49ers
Tags: , , , , ,

This Is My Last Post, Bro

Published by rakesh on February 1st, 2013

by Rakesh The Intern

Check it out, bro. All of this talk about brothers in the Super Bowl has made me realize that I miss all thirteen of my brothers back in Howrah, and I am going to move back there for a few months to spend time with them as well as handicap some local cricket matches, buddy. But I tell my boss that I do one more article about American football gambling before I go, so this is what I think will happen on Sunday other than me nailing drunk American girl, my friend. (more…)

2 Comments »
Posted in AFC North, Baltimore Ravens, NFC West, NFL, San Francisco 49ers
Tags: , , , , , ,

Retarded

Published by tgim on January 30th, 2013

by Tommy Gimler

We’re not sure who asked the question. It might have been a midget dressed in a clown suit. It might have been Miss Alabama Katherine Webb, who has all of sudden become the hottest thing since squirter porn. Or it could have been Jay Glazer. We don’t know. But some member of the Super Bowl XLVII asked Baltimore Ravens quarterback Joe Flacco how he felt about the possibility of playing in a cold weather Super Bowl next year, and Flacco uttered three syllables that offended thousands, including of all groups of people, The New York Post. But not us. We think “retarded” pretty much sums up the entire discussion. (more…)

2 Comments »
Posted in AFC North, Baltimore Ravens, NFC West, NFL, San Francisco 49ers
Tags: , , , , , , ,