All the AFC East posts:

Jonathan Martin Was Fined $100 Numerous Times For Being A Big Pussy

Published by rhombus on February 15th, 2014

by Frank Rhombus

NFL investigator Ted Wells released an epic 144-page report on the Miami Dolphins yesterday detailing everything from Jonathan Martin’s pussy issues to Richie Incognito’s farts. The biggest takeaway? You guessed it: Martin was fined ten times as much as Incognito for tearing ass. (more…)

The Kellen Winslow Cranking One In A Target Parking Lot Jokes Have Already Begun

Published by tgim on January 21st, 2014

by Tommy Gimler

What do the woman who didn’t know the sale on home furnishings was over and Kellen Winslow have in common? They both got caught with their pants down at Target. What was Kellen Winslow doing in a Target parking lot? He was masturbating. Those jokes are fucking terrible. But thanks to Charles Barkley and the rest of the crew at Inside The NBA, this one is not. (more…)

Thanks To Kellen Winslow, “Looking For Boston Market” Can Now Be Used As Slang For Masturbating

Published by tgim on January 17th, 2014

by Tommy Gimler

To say that we’re excited for this Sunday’s conference championship games is an understatement. But to say that we’re a “pull our SUV into a Target parking lot, open two containers of Vaseline, and start jerking off” kind of excited, well, that might be a stretch. (more…)

Omaha Steaks Considering Showing Peyton Manning The Money

Published by tgim on January 15th, 2014

by Tommy Gimler

Everybody watching the Chargers-Broncos game on Sunday heard Peyton Manning yell “Omaha” at the line of scrimmage like six thousand times. Well, everybody except Lou Ferrigno. And now, at least one company is seriously considering paying Manning and other quarterbacks to yell their name at the line instead. (more…)

Adam Feuerberg’s Report On Four Teams All Of Us Actually Give A Shit About

Published by feuerberg on January 13th, 2014

by Adam Feuerberg

So the stage is set for what I consider to be the last real weekend in football, NFL Conference Championship Sunday. I know the real NFL title is decided in the Super Bowl, but that game is more Madison Avenue’s waking wet dream than it is a football game. (more…)

Best Of The DUD 2013: Playing Mad Libs With Richie Incognito’s Voicemail Transcript

Published by tgim on January 1st, 2014

by Tommy Gimler

The whole “Richie Incognito bullying and calling that pussy Jonathan Martin a half-nigger piece of shit” episode was kind of a big story in 2013. We put a nice little touch on it. (more…)