Category Archives: NFL

Some Poor Bastard Missed Out On A $150,000 8-Team Parlay Because Eli Manning Is Pure Dog Shit

eli manning blows

by Tommy Gimler

Geez, at this point, it’s pretty much a toss-up as to which is more dangerous for your health, putting your faith in Eli Manning or sticking your dick into an electrical outlet.

Watching Comedian Vic DiBitetto Tear The Giants A New Asshole Is One Of The Funniest Things We’ve Ever Seen

vic dibitetto giants rant

by Frank Rhombus

Very good, Eli. Keep making those commercials with your fucking brother. Nice.

Here’s Proof That God Does Indeed Hate The Cleveland Browns

cody-parkey-missed-field-goal

by Tommy Gimler

And he must not give a shit about Ryan Fitzpatrick either.

Time To Buy Hooker And Cigar Thanks To These NFL And College Football Picks

Rakesh

by Rakesh the Intern

After going 3-0 with my NFL picks last week, let me tell you, bro, let’s just say the only reason Rakesh is still not having bang with hooker is because local 7-Eleven ran out of condom, my friend.

Nothing Takes Away The Pain Of A Packers Loss Quite Like Jay Cutler Throwing Off His Back Foot, Getting Picked Off And Then Bitched At By A Teammate In Street Clothes

cutler

by Tommy Gimler

For the eighth consecutive season, it looks as though the biggest pick-me-up for Packers fans after watching Aaron Rodgers and his teammates play like real assholes for 60 minutes is going to be the sight of Jay Cutler playing like an even bigger asshole during the same week.

5 Legit Reasons Why The NFL’s Ratings Are Down

nfl-ratings-low

by Tommy Gimler

Television ratings for the Sunday Night Football shitshow that was the Vikings hosting the Packers in their new stadium that will eventually cost taxpayers $678 million were down 16 percent from last year’s Week 2 tilt featuring the Packers and Seahawks, which once again goes to show that nobody likes the Vikings.

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