Category Archives: Oregon Ducks

Our Experts’ Picks For Tonight’s College Football National Championship


by Tommy Gimler

One of us sells liquor. One of us books models. One of us smokes a shit ton of pot all day long. Still, we’re probably more qualified than Mel Kiper and his bulletproof dome when it comes to talking college football, and that’s because he’s a miserable fucking turd.

No Means No

jameis winston

by Eddie Bagelstein

Remember when Florida State’s war cry was as ubiquitous as getting away with sexual assault? You couldn’t be a passive sports fan without seeing FSU fans tomahawking away like they were forcing opponents to walk the Trail of Tears. And then the Braves got on board and quantified the ubiquity.

The Return of Rakesh As The Golden Nugget Releases Early College Football Lines


by Tommy Gimler and Rakesh

I guess the Golden Nugget Hotel and Casino is useful for something other than bringing back a hooker, slitting her throat, and stuffing her in the recycling bin. Apparently, the Las Vegas shithole has released early 2013 college football lines for 250 games already. So, we got in touch with our old intern Rakesh the only way you can reach someone in Howrah these days: by goat. And we told Rakesh if he gave us four early games to bet on, he could keep the goat and eat it. Here’s what he gave us:

The Only Thing That Didn’t Happen This Weekend Was Me Getting A Beej


by Tommy Gimler

On location all weekend in Houston, there was no way I was getting any action with my wife over 1,500 miles away. It was exactly the opposite for football enthusiasts across the country:

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