Category Archives: NL East

2015 National League Win Total Over/Unders Are Out, You Hookers

papelbon

by Tommy Gimler

It’s 12 degrees in Milwaukee today, so odds are that any news about the boys of summer will be a welcome sight for those poor fuckers.

Chipper Jones Doesn’t Think Sandy Hook Happened

Chipper Jones Sandy Hook Tweet

by Tommy Gimler

As a retired baseball player, you have two responsibilities: show up for card signings on time and don’t say anything stupid. Well, I suppose if you can find the time to sleep with your own wife for a change, that would be somewhere on the list as well. Any crap, Chipper Jones fucked that up over the weekend.

Hey Ladies! You Can Go To The NLDS With This Douche, But You’ll Have To Pay For Your Ticket

teddy-roosevelt-washington-nationals

by Frank Rhombus

The nerve of this fucking guy.

Ruben Amaro’s Fake Gmail Account Is Shit Your Pants Awesome

ruben amaro gmail

by Tommy Gimler

When Jayson Werth leaves a message entitled “$126 MILLION AND IN FIRST PLACE – BLOW ME,” you’ve got our attention.

Cliff Lee Farted At The End Of His Interview Last Night

Cliff Lee Fart

by Tommy Gimler

Baseball players and managers farting during postgame interviews is becoming almost as common as an East Coast frat house rape. The latest to join the trend was Philadelphia’s Cliff Lee, who blew ass on Comcast Sportsnet after answering several questions pertaining to his shittiness last night.

Breaking Down Just How Pig Shit Awful Dan Uggla Really Was

dan uggla

by Tommy Gimler

Despite his Lou Ferrigno biceps and Cee-Lo Green neck, Dan Uggla was released by the Atlanta Braves yesterday, meaning Uggla is going to make almost $20 million through the end of the 2015 season for doing absolutely nothing. Then again, that pretty much sums up what he’s been doing since 2012.

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