Category Archives: NL East

Ruben Amaro’s Fake Gmail Account Is Shit Your Pants Awesome

ruben amaro gmail

by Tommy Gimler

When Jayson Werth leaves a message entitled “$126 MILLION AND IN FIRST PLACE – BLOW ME,” you’ve got our attention.

Cliff Lee Farted At The End Of His Interview Last Night

Cliff Lee Fart

by Tommy Gimler

Baseball players and managers farting during postgame interviews is becoming almost as common as an East Coast frat house rape. The latest to join the trend was Philadelphia’s Cliff Lee, who blew ass on Comcast Sportsnet after answering several questions pertaining to his shittiness last night.

Breaking Down Just How Pig Shit Awful Dan Uggla Really Was

dan uggla

by Tommy Gimler

Despite his Lou Ferrigno biceps and Cee-Lo Green neck, Dan Uggla was released by the Atlanta Braves yesterday, meaning Uggla is going to make almost $20 million through the end of the 2015 season for doing absolutely nothing. Then again, that pretty much sums up what he’s been doing since 2012.

Just Another Reason Why Catching A Home Run Ball Isn’t That Important

giancarlo stanton home run hand

by Tommy Gimler

Believe it or not, this guy did not just get done fingering Grimace.

So, Greg Maddux Used To Piss On Rookies In The Shower

greg maddux

by Tommy Gimler

Lost somewhere between the pictures of Prince Fielder’s fat naked ass and Venus Williams covering up her nips in ESPN The Magazine’s “Body Issue” this year was a little diddy written by David Fleming about St. Louis Rams rookie and admitted homosexual Michael Sam having to take showers in an NFL locker room. There were two big takeaways from the article. First, even straight NFL players look at each other’s cocks in the showers. It’s called meat peeping. And second, Greg Maddux used to pee on rookies in the shower. Yes, that Greg Maddux.

The Top 5 MLB First Half Fantasy DUDs

harper thumb injury

by Tommy Gimler

Matthew Berry and Eric Karabell are huge fucking dorks at the four-letter, and they told you to draft these guys before the 2014 MLB season started. But odds are if you still have these turds on your fantasy baseball team, you’re almost as far away from winning a championship as Danica Patrick is from winning a race on American soil.

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