by Tommy Gimler
What’s crazier than the Spanish voice of the Philadelphia Phillies being named Rickie Ricardo? How about the fact that Ricardo might have been responsible for the first ever back-to-back home runs off of Cincinnati Reds closer Aroldis Chapman on Sunday? Or how about the fact that Chapman was able to take the mound without shitting himself after inhaling 18 Cuban pastries before the game? (more…)
by Tommy Gimler
14 MLB teams currently sport a record under .500 in this young 2013 season. And nobody celebrates futility like us. Well, nobody celebrates deplorable futility quite like Taylor Swift, but after her, it’s definitely us. Anyway, since we’re in Joliet, Illinois on a slow Saturday night and we’ve been advised by others to just stay behind our locked hotel room doors, we decided to look at each shitty team and pinpoint at least one shitty stat that has contributed to the team’s shittiness. (more…)
by Tommy Gimler
When an athlete reveals to the world that he is gay, it isn’t news. Or at least it shouldn’t be. But when a major sports publication takes the first male athlete from one of the major four sports to come out of the closet and inadvertently makes him out to be a “super gay,” well then, that’s something to talk about. (more…)
by Tommy Gimler
Dear DUD,
Just as I was ready to write this season off, the Milwaukee Brewers rattled off nine wins in a row to climb above .500. While I should be excited about what’s happening, I can’t help but be disgusted with what I see from Rickie Weeks again this year. He has to be on pace for over 200 strikeouts, and my kid’s weight is higher than his batting average again. In your opinion, do you think Weeks is the worst player in baseball, or am I biased because I’m a Brewers fan? Thanks. Love the site. (more…)
by Tommy Gimler
Let’s face it. Milwaukee Brewers pitcher Yovani Gallardo has been an absolute turd for your fantasy team through three games this year. But when he decided to get shithoused on Monday night/Tuesday morning before getting behind the wheel of his pickup truck, he finally delivered that top notch performance that fantasy owners had been waiting for. That is, of course, only if you had him on your CAGA (Current Athletes Getting Arrested) fantasy league. Let’s break this bitch down. (more…)
by Tommy Gimler
Our latest mailbag is pretty disgusting. I mean, apparently there is a way to make Taylor Swift worse. (more…)
{ Yup, as long as those people aren't made of meat... } – May 22, 9:46 AM
{ Prince Fielder will down that many Cuban pastries and the person who ate them; in one sitting of course..... } – May 22, 1:41 AM { You're a silly little cunt hair, Mr. Santos... } – May 20, 6:03 PM { The Bills don't suck because they run a simple west coast offense, they suck because they draft players like E J Manuel in the first... } – May 20, 10:30 AM
{ Suck on a cheese curd, EJ is gonna dissapoint you like you dissapointed your wifes parents when you married her and light it up this... } – May 19, 10:49 PM
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