Category Archives: NL Central

Matt Garza’s Offseason Training Apparently Includes Promoting Abstinence

matt-garza abstinence

by Tommy Gimler

Damn, Brewers fans. Imagine if he put this much effort into locating his fastball.

Some Truly Remarkable Shit Went Down In Between The Cubs’ Last Two World Series Championships


by Tommy Gimler

Greatest. Game. Ever.

John Lackey Always Has Been, Still Is And Always Will Be A Gigantic Turd

john lackey sucks balls

by Tommy Gimler

All is right on the North Side today, as the beloved Chicago Cubs curb stomped the Los Angeles Dodgers 10-2 in Game 4 of the NLCS last night, knotting the series at two games apiece.

5 Bold Predictions For The 2016 World Series


by Tommy Gimler

It’s been 19 years since that turd Jose Mesa couldn’t get three outs in the bottom of the ninth inning in Game 7 for the Tribe, and the last time the Cubs played in a World Series, all professional baseball players were white. Starting tonight, something’s gotta give.

The Cubs Got So Shithoused After Last Night’s Thrilling Win That One Of Them Fell Off The Bus This Morning

cubs player falls off bus

by Tommy Gimler

Thank God it wasn’t David Ross or he probably would have busted a hip.

Things Are So Good In Chicago These Days That Cubs Fans Are Making ‘We Don’t Suck Anymore’ Parody Songs

joey busse we don't suck anymore

by Tommy Gimler

Of course in true Cubs fan fashion, it was written and released during the regular season.

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