Category Archives: NL Central

So You Probably Don’t Want To Fuck This Guy

carlos-martinez

by Frank Rhombus

Being on the wrong end of a 6-1 curb stomping yesterday is probably the least of Carlos Martinez’s worries right now.

Thursday Night Was About As Good As It Gets For A Sports Night

jake arrieta no hitter

by Tommy Gimler

If you’re not a fan of double-overtime winners on the ice, no-hitters, or game-winning shots with time winding down in playoff basketball games, well, then you can just go fuck yourself.

Banning ‘Try Not To Suck’ Shirts At Busch Stadium Is Yet Another Reason Why The Cardinals Can Eat A Dick

try not to suck

by Tommy Gimler

The pussification of America continues.

If You’re Wondering If Jon Lester Can Throw To First Base, The Answer Is Still No

jon lester

by Frank Rhombus

Remember last year’s media circus surrounding the notion that Jon Lester couldn’t throw the ball over to first base?

The St. Louis Cardinals Look Old And Terrible

leake loses cardinals debut

by Tommy Gimler

Sure, the 2016 MLB season is younger than a girl Roman Polanski likes to rape, but the St. Louis Cardinals left a lot to be desired after getting swept in Pittsburgh to start the year.

Easter Sunday In 1987 Was A Pretty Tits Sports Day

rob deer easter sunday

by Tommy Gimler

Rob. Fucking. Deer.

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