Category Archives: NL Central

The Pittsburgh Pirates Front Office Once Again Shoves Their Fist Up Joe Pirates Fan’s Ass

dejected pirates fans

by Tommy Gimler

Sooner or later, the Pittsburgh Pirates are going to have to show their fans that they’re actually in the business of winning. And by sitting with their thumbs up their asses yet again today while teams around them proved to their fans that they are actually interested in bringing home a World Series title, the Pirates front office continued their long tradition of tolerating failure.

Jack White Is Probably The Scariest Looking Baseball Fan Of All-Time

jack white

by Tommy Gimler

Maybe if he wasn’t following such a dog shit team like the Cubs, Jack White would be just a tad on the happier side.

The Funniest First Half Breakdown For All 30 MLB Teams

brewers walk off

by Tommy Gimler

Brewers and Athletics fans probably have permaboners, as their respective teams have been hotter than Kate Upton and Imogen Thomas bumping hump holes. Meanwhile, if the old fucks in St. Petersburg nursing homes haven’t had a chance to catch any Tampa Bay Rays games yet, they should just take a look in their diapers to see what their team has been playing like.

This “Vote Lucroy For Starting All-Star Game Catcher” Ad Is Hysterical

Vote For Lucroy

by Tommy Gimler

Making a funny video in hopes of getting voted to the MLB All-Star Game is becoming almost as trendy as getting raped in an East Coast frat house. But this video released by the Milwaukee Brewers yesterday for catcher Jonathan Lucroy is probably the funniest one we’ve ever seen.

Hey, John Axford Sucks Again

john axford sucks

by Tommy Gimler

Only in meteorology, Congress, and sports can you be a worthless turd and still earn some pretty good coin. The Cleveland Indians gave John Axford $5 million in the offseason to finish their games in 2014, and I suppose he’s technically doing that. It’s just that he’s finishing their games as one pathetic loser.

A Backup Catcher Is Apparently The Real Life Roy Hobbs

knocks cover off ball

by Tommy Gimler

Unless you live in the Milwaukee or Pittsburgh metropolitan areas, odds are you weren’t tuned into the Brewers-Pirates game because you were busy doing anything else. But in the sixth inning of their 5-3 win, Brewers backup catcher Martin Maldonado reached first base after literally knocking the cover off the ball.

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