Category Archives: Seattle Mariners

I Ate A Pot Cookie And Then Predicted How Every AL Team Would Finish

terry francona indians

by Frank Rhombus

If my calculations are correct, the Indians are going to win six billion games this year.

Texas Rangers Fan Celebrates Rougned Odor’s Walk-Off Home Run By Grabbing Some Tit On Live TV

rougned odor walk off home run boob grab

by Tommy Gimler

We should all be this happy at least three times a week.

One Guy Was More Excited About Robinson Cano’s Grand Slam Than Everybody Else

robinson cano grand slam double dicks

by Frank Rhombus

It looked like it was a real sausagefest at “The ‘Pen” inside Safeco Field last night, so if this guy would’ve wanted to celebrate with two actual dicks, it probably would’ve been doable.

Here Is Exactly How The AL West Will Finish in 2016

josh hamilton

by Rakesh the Intern

Listen, bro. It looks like in this division we have four teams who could make a run for AL West title and then the Angels.

2015 AL West Preview

cano hernandez

by Tommy Gimler

The Mariners might win the division, but it’s still Mike Trout who can plow my sister.

The Funniest First Half Breakdown For All 30 MLB Teams

brewers walk off

by Tommy Gimler

Brewers and Athletics fans probably have permaboners, as their respective teams have been hotter than Kate Upton and Imogen Thomas bumping hump holes. Meanwhile, if the old fucks in St. Petersburg nursing homes haven’t had a chance to catch any Tampa Bay Rays games yet, they should just take a look in their diapers to see what their team has been playing like.

Image Description