All the AL East posts:

Saturday Night Stat Dork

Published by tgim on May 18th, 2013

by Tommy Gimler

14 MLB teams currently sport a record under .500 in this young 2013 season. And nobody celebrates futility like us. Well, nobody celebrates deplorable futility quite like Taylor Swift, but after her, it’s definitely us. Anyway, since we’re in Joliet, Illinois on a slow Saturday night and we’ve been advised by others to just stay behind our locked hotel room doors, we decided to look at each shitty team and pinpoint at least one shitty stat that has contributed to the team’s shittiness. (more…)

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Posted in AL Central, AL East, AL West, Chicago Cubs, Chicago White Sox, Houston Astros, LA Angels of Anaheim, Los Angeles Dodgers, Miami Marlins, Milwaukee Brewers, Minnesota Twins, MLB, New York Mets, NL Central, NL East, NL West, Philadelphia Phillies, San Diego Padres, Toronto Blue Jays
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Baseball’s Biggest Busts

Published by tgim on May 10th, 2013

by Tommy Gimler

Sure, it’s still early in the 2013 MLB season. But just like it’s never too early in the relationship to tell your girlfriend to lose two, three, or thirty pounds, it’s not too early to label these teams as anything other than absolute fucking failures. (more…)

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Posted in AL East, AL West, LA Angels of Anaheim, Los Angeles Dodgers, MLB, NL East, NL West, Philadelphia Phillies, Toronto Blue Jays
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If This Is A Strike, Then I’ve Got A Ten-Inch Hog

Published by tgim on April 9th, 2013

by Tommy Gimler

Sure, the MLB season is less than two weeks old, but every game counts. And we’ll have to wait and see if this game comes back to bite the Tampa Bay Rays in the ass. And we’ll never know if Tampa Bay’s Evan Longoria would have driven in the game-tying or winning run off of Texas Rangers closer Joe Nathan. But the one thing we do know is that this pitch should be called strike three about as often as I am called a black porn star: never. (more…)

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Posted in AL East, AL West, MLB, Tampa Bay Rays, Texas Rangers
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Get The Shit Out Of Your Ears: Our First DUDcast

Published by tgim on April 3rd, 2013

by Tommy Gimler and Michael Louis

What do you get when you lock five sports fans and a comedian in a condo loaded with two bottles of Glenfiddich, eighteen Bud Lights, and a high-speed internet connection? Well, I guess it depends on which part of Los Angeles you live in. But in this case, we’re talking about our first podcast: The DUDcast. (more…)

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Posted in AL Central, AL East, AL West, Arizona Diamondbacks, Atlanta Braves, Baltimore Orioles, Boston Red Sox, Chicago Cubs, Chicago White Sox, Cincinnati Reds, Cleveland Indians, Colorado Rockies, Detroit Tigers, DUDcast, Houston Astros, Kansas City Royals, LA Angels of Anaheim, Los Angeles Dodgers, Miami Marlins, Milwaukee Brewers, Minnesota Twins, MLB, New York Mets, New York Yankees, NL Central, NL East, NL West, Oakland Athletics, Philadelphia Phillies, Pittsburgh Pirates, San Diego Padres, San Francisco Giants, Seattle Mariners, St. Louis Cardinals, Tampa Bay Rays, Texas Rangers, Toronto Blue Jays, Washington Nationals
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Jigga What? Robinson Cano Ditches Scott Boras For Jay-Z

Published by tgim on April 2nd, 2013

by Tommy Gimler

Add Jay-Z to the list of guys who can plow my sister. Is there anything this guy can’t do? I mean, if sports representation was a problem before, looks like he’s down to 98. (more…)

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Posted in AL East, MLB, New York Yankees
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DUD MLB Preview: The AL East

Published by tgim on March 29th, 2013

by Tommy Gimler

If you’ haven’t been to the new Yankee Stadium yet, don’t worry. There will be plenty of available seats this year as the New York Yankees are in trouble, like a force farting on your grandma’s couch after a Taco Bell dinner kind of trouble. The Yanks haven’t won fewer than 87 games in a full season since 1992, also the same year they turned in their last sub-.500 season, but there’s a good chance that both of those runs, unlike yours, Taco Bell boy, come to an end in 2013. (more…)

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Posted in AL East, Baltimore Orioles, Boston Red Sox, MLB, New York Yankees, Tampa Bay Rays, Toronto Blue Jays
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