Category Archives: Baltimore Orioles

The Orioles Got Stuck In An Elevator Yesterday

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by Frank Rhombus

I don’t have time to be cute, so I’m just going to come out and say it: The Baltimore Orioles are fucking garbage.

Baltimore Bag Of S**t Chris Davis Is On Pace For The Worst Season Ever

Chris Davis

by Tommy Gimler

Imagine going into work at the Hostess plant, but instead of standing on the line and making sure each Ding Dong is filled with the correct amount of creamy deliciousness, you spend the majority of each day in a meth-induced coma while trapped inside the Zingers girl’s locker.

Bartenders Pub In Baltimore Is Giving Away Free Shots If You’re There While Chris Davis Actually Gets A Hit

Chris Davis

by Tommy Gimler

Chris Davis is terrible.

Here Is Exactly How Every American League Team Will Finish In 2018

king felix

by Tommy Gimler

As long as King Felix’s arm doesn’t fall off in June, we think the Mariners might be something this year.

Kato Fucking Kaelin Won The 50/50 Raffle At Monday’s Brewers-Orioles Game

kato 50

by Tommy Gimler

“The money won’t go very far in L.A.” Yeah, unless you use it on something other than coke.

I Ate A Pot Cookie And Then Predicted How Every AL Team Would Finish

terry francona indians

by Frank Rhombus

If my calculations are correct, the Indians are going to win six billion games this year.

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