Category Archives: MLB

Justin Verlander Being ‘Too Exhausted’ To Hump Kate Upton After A Game Is Another Sign The End Is Near

kate upton justin verlander no sex

by Tommy Gimler

It’s like having a lifetime all-you-can-eat pass at Morton’s but paying to eat at Sizzler four nights a week: insanity.

Hi, I’m Colby Rasmus And I Look Like This On Purpose

colby rasmus beard

by Tommy Gimler

If you were to tell us that Tampa Bay Rays outfielder is now celibate, we’d have no choice but to believe you.

This Week’s Take 5

nick swisher retires

by Kinner Shah

A quick look at the five sports stories from this week that really mattered.

White Sox Pitching Prospect Chucks Ball Clocked At 110 MPH

michael kopech 110 mph

by Tommy Gimler

One tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin!

Matt Garza’s Offseason Training Apparently Includes Promoting Abstinence

matt-garza abstinence

by Tommy Gimler

Damn, Brewers fans. Imagine if he put this much effort into locating his fastball.

Shitty New MLB Hazing Rules Say Rookies Can No Longer Dress Up Like Women

david wright dressed up as a woman

by Tommy Gimler

But why, dad? Why can’t ballplayers dress up like women anymore? Well, son. I guess we’ll just have to live with the fact that everybody in this country has turned into a giant pussy.

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