Tyson Fury Is Punching His Clown 7 Times A Day To Get Ready For His Boxing Match Next Month

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by Frank Rhombus

There’s choking the chicken and then there’s this, which is pretty much the equivalent to sending the birds straight to slaughterhouse.

Tyson Fury is hoping to get his hands on the WBC heavyweight title by taking down Deontay Wilder in a highly-anticipated rematch next month. In the meantime, it appears as though he’ll have his hands all over himself.

Asked by a boxing journalist what he was doing to get ready for the bout, Fury dropped this gem of a quote:

“I’m masturbating seven times a day to keep my testosterone pumping. Pump it, pump it, pump it, pump it up! Dontcha know! Listen, I gotta to keep active and the testosterone flowing. Don’t want the levels to go down.”

Of course, that’s exactly how 72 percent of college freshmen will be preparing for their midterms in six weeks.

In a related story, don’t shake Tyson Fury’s hand…

Wait, there’s more: These Two Pictures Help Illustrate Why Joe Burrow Is Our Favorite College Football Player

You have got to see this shit:

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