Here Is How The NFC West Will Finish, Bro

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by Rakesh the Intern

This is division where most coaches and quarterbacks have sexually attractive girlies, bro!

Check it out, bro. It’s once again that time of year when silly game of American football consumes our lives. No more play with penis on Sunday afternoon. No more go out Thursday night and look for poon, my friend. It is now time for daddy to lose college fund on fixed game of NFL football. Unless of course daddy takes gambling advice from Rakesh and throws Rupee down on these picks for NFC West win totals.

Good luck, bro.

1. Seattle Seahawks

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Listen, bro. This Seahawks team is Cousin Gokul’s favorite team because of this Shaq Griffin gentleman. Gokul said he can relate to Griffin because Gokul was born with baby left arm, and game of billiards has been bitch to play his entire life, bro. But on top of stud defender who can play with just one hand, this Seahawks team is primed to return to top of division thanks to solid draft, best running game in business and this Russell Wilson. When Eminem rap about you, you know you’re legend, bro…

2018 record: 10-6 (2nd)

2019 DUD prediction: 11-5 (1st)

Vegas says: 8.5 wins (t-2nd)

Bleacher Report says: 8-8 (3rd)

Sporting News says: 8-8 (t-2nd)

2. Los Angeles Rams

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I’m telling you, bro. This one is almost as simple as Cousin Harish, and he was born with just three-quarter brain, bro. There is simply no way this team can relive 13-3 record from year ago with shit from pig quarterback Jared Goff. Sure, give him billion Rupee, bro. Now watch defense pick him apart because he suck balls or whatever you say in this country. Defense can still make the noise or whatever with this Aaron Donald, but tough schedule and improved division opponent will make for Wild Card team, not division champ this year, bro…

2018 record: 13-3 (1st)

2019 DUD prediction: 10-6 (2nd)

Vegas says: 10 wins (1st)

Bleacher Report says: 11-5 (1st)

Sporting News says: 11-5 (1st)

3. San Francisco 49ers

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Let me tell you something, bro. This 49ers team will make much improvement with this poon hound Jimmy G back at quarterback this year. Maybe he now leads that he should just chuck pigskin instead of run. Major defense improvement and addition of this Tevin Coleman in backfield means that 49ers could make push for division this year, but I say they fall just short. Just short, but still over the win total thugs in Vegas have laid out here, bro…

2018 record: 4-12 (3rd)

2019 DUD prediction: 9-7 (3rd)

Vegas says: 8.5 wins (t-2nd)

Bleacher Report says: 9-7 (2nd)

Sporting News says: 8-8 (t-2nd)

4. Arizona Cardinals

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Check it out, bro. This Arizona Cardinals team should be fun to watch now that Kliff Kingsbury and his hot poon have arrived in desert. Running back David Johnson will probably return to one of the best in game, especially if team runs almost 100 plays per game, bro. But while offense might be running fast like that Forrest Gump fuck, this defense will suck shit, bro. That makes picking them last easier than my ex-girlie Akansh, and she was biggest slut in Howrah. Even Cousin Gokul got piece of that poon. Sick shit, bro…

2018 record: 3-13 (4th)

2019 DUD prediction: 4-12 (4th)

Vegas says: 5.5 wins (4th)

Bleacher Report says: 4-12 (4th)

Sporting News says: 3-13 (4th)

Wait, there’s more, bro: Here Is How The NFC South Will Finish, Bro

You have got to see this shit, bro:

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