Every Kicker At Bears Rookie Minicamp Got A Chance To Hit A 43-Yard Field Goal And There Were Six Misses

Wild Card Round - Philadelphia Eagles v Chicago Bears

by Tommy Gimler

Laces out, fuckface!

If you were unaware Cody Parkey missed a 43-yard field goal (or had it blocked) to bring the once promising 2018 season for the Chicago Bears to an end in the Windy City, well, congrats on waking up from your coma. Since then, Parkey has been shitcanned, Goose Island held an amazing contest outside their brewery to see if anybody in the general public could hit one, the Bears have brought in somewhere around 37,000 potential replacements and one of them is even named Chris Blewitt.

Well, head coach Matt Nagy isn’t fucking around this year. To wrap up the Bears rookie minicamp, Nagy gave each kicker in camp a chance to hit the same 43-yarder that Parkey missed. How’d that go? Well, pig shit awful if you’re a Bears fan:

Asked why each kicker had to give it a go from 43 yards out, Nagy didn’t beat around the bush:

The good news for Chicago fans is that it’s only May, and the Cubbies are on a fucking tear. Winners of 12 of their last 15, the last thing on most North Siders minds right now is whoever it is that’s going to be missing kicks at Soldier Field in September. But for the love of Christ, let’s hope it’s that poor fucker with the last name Blewitt…

Wait, there’s more: Even Stephen A. Smith’s Guests Are Douchebags

You have got to see this shit:

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