Dear God: Next Time Around I’d Like To Be Christian Yelich. Thanks.

yelich capeluj

by Tommy Gimler

It’s apparently good to be the reigning NL MVP. Very good.

Meet Mabelynn Capeluj, Yelich’s date at last night’s Bucks-Suns game in Phoenix:

Now Capeluj says she’s a Buffalo wing connoisseur, which for most the men in Wisconsin is just an added turn-on since she enjoys food, but we’re pretty sure Yelich didn’t bring her out to the Bucks’ worst game of the year because of that. Our “hunch” says that it has more to do with her being Miss California 2013.

These Instagram pics should do the trick in explaining how she won that crown:


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Yo sin ti me siento bien @yasminekateb

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@everything_derekhui

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Lost & found. @gregorio

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Dime si tú quieres andar conmigo, no tiene caso que sea tu amigo @yasminekateb @infusionbcps @mgs.shop

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@semouiller by @bre_tiesi & @jiordyn ❤️

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In a related story, Yelich already has four hits this spring, and that’s not including the ones off the diamond. If we were, I’d imagine he’d be somewhere up near 6,000…

Wait, there’s more: Texas Cornerback Asked At NFL Combine If He Has Two Balls

You have got to see this shit:

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