Second Round Of NFL Playoffs Is Perfect Time To Stick It Up Bookie’s Anus, Bro

Rakesh

by Rakesh the Intern

Brady and Patriots are not what they once were. Stop me if you heard this before, bro.

Check it out, bro. There are only seven games left in the season in this silly game of American football, so if you are still down Rupee for year, this is probably best week to get it back and make bookie bitch in process, my friend. Here is what I am thinking for this weekend, bro:

Indianapolis at Kansas City UNDER 57 Points

Listen, bro. If I had testicle, I would tell you to take Colt in this one, but I’m not sure what I have left under this giant pube bush. Haven’t cut them since I left Toledo, bro. Anyway, bro, it’s like my Uncle Omkar said before he was hauled off to Howrah prison for fixing local cricket match. Betting public is dumber than shit box, so whatever they’re taking, bet the other way and enjoy hooker with newfound Rupee. In this case, 80 percent are expecting more than 57 points in this one, so Rakesh is taking under big time, bro…

Dallas at LA Rams (-7)

I’m telling you, bro. If you think Cowboys team coached by Jason Garrett is going to come into shit from pig LA Coliseum and not get bitch slapped by former Dallas head coach and current Rams defense coach Wade Phillips, well, that would make you crazier than Uncle Kunal, and we once caught that guy fucking goat at family reunion. Sick shit, bro. Load and lock up on this Rams team in this one, bro…

LA Chargers at New England (-4)

Let me tell you something, bro. Ever since I was eating fat girlie poon at University of Toledo, this Patriots team has been taking care of lesser teams at home and doing it with convince fashion or whatever you say in this country. Every year media says that Tom Brady and Patriots are finally done and guess what happen then, bro. They beat shit out of opponent. This time it will be Philip River getting back on team plane with ass fucking. He is one quarterback who can make Brady look like speed demon. Patriots might win this one by 30 point, bro…

Philadelphia at New Orleans OVER 51 Points

Check it out, bro. There is supposedly bad blood between these two teams because of shit kicking that went down last time these two teams meet. Well, that is always good talk for point total over, as it likely means teams won’t let up even with just few minutes left in game no matter what score is just for chance to shove it up other team’s hole in penis. It’s like Grandpa Sahir always say. Well, he says nothing now because he’s dead. Sad shit, bro. Just load up on over in this one, bro…

Year so far, bro: 51-42

Last time: 4-4

NCAA: 25-22

NFL: 26-20

Wait, there is more, bro: Kentucky Beats Texas A&M By 14 And Covers – Oh Wait, Dude Hits Half-Court Shot At Buzzer To Wreck Your Parlay

You have got to see this shit, bro:

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