NFC And AFC Championship Games Are Great Time To Make Bookie Your Bitch, Bro

Rakesh

by Rakesh the Intern

GOAT has different meaning in my country, bro.

I just realize now that media calling Tom Brady “GOAT” mean that they are calling him “greatest of all time,” bro. Here I was thinking this whole time that they were worshiping him like my family worship goats in Howrah. My bad, bro.

Anyway, enough about my struggle with English language. Let’s win some Rupee betting on this silly game of American football. Here is what I am thinking for today, bro:

NFC Championship Game

LA Rams (+3) at New Orleans and OVER 56.5 Points

Listen, bro. If you think NFL is going to let this Saints team win game with city being just six and half hour drive from Atlanta, then you are crazier than Uncle Kunal, and we once caught that guy fucking goat at family reunion. Sick shit, bro. Plus, under has hit in 7 of last 8 Saints games. Sooner or later, this over has to hit. It remind me of Cousin Anagi in college. She would let something like 13 freshmen jackhammer her at same time, and she would keep doing this as though nothing bad was going to happen. Well, a short while later, her poon broke. Over might hit in this one by halftime, bro, so load and lock up Rupee on those points and Rams, bro…

AFC Championship Game

New England (+3.5) at Kansas City and OVER 56.5 Points

Check it out, bro. This one is almost as simple as Cousin Harish, and he was born with just three-quarter brain. Spends most of his days digging in anus looking for gummy bears. Sad shit, bro. Anyway, how many times are we going to hear that this Tom Brady fellow is done and Patriots are washed up and then they come out and crush opponent like runaway elephant that crushed Cousin Manoj in streets of Howrah? Really like the hook in this one too, bro. As far as point total, I would like to enjoy watching game instead of rooting for penalties and third-down stops. Best of luck with Pats and over, bro…

Year so far, bro: 54-43

Last time: 3-1

NCAA: 25-22

NFL: 29-21

Wait, there’s more, bro: Your Weekly Video Proof That Stephen A. Smith Is An Idiot

You have got to see this shit, bro:

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