It’s Time For Another NBA Season, Where 4 Teams Have A Shot And The Other 26 Are Just Fluffers

gordon hayward injury

by Tommy Gimler

Oh wait. He’s not laughing in that picture?

Let’s be honest, kids. The NBA is the biggest farce when it comes to professional sports leagues in this country. I mean, why are people still going to pay to watch an Orlando Magic game this year? That team has no fucking chance at winning 30 games much less an NBA championship. And even when teams worth watching like the Golden State Warriors come to town, it’s still not worth the price of admission because three of their stars will take the night off.

That’s why I called up gambling guru Barry Murphy, The Fabulous T Sean and Justin Gilbert and said, “Hey, let’s put some money on this shit.” After all, even when the majority of games are fixed, it still means that one side is going to be a winner.

Each “gentleman” put 50 chocolate chip cookies on the line with five win total over/under bets, with the first one being worth 30 points because it’s the “Joan Crawford Sure Thing” pick. Apparently Crawford had a plan when it came to getting in the movies of her choice in those days, and that of course was by humping everybody in Tinseltown. The second pick is worth 20 points, as it’s the “Vanessa Marquez Dead Right” pick, and it’s given that name for obvious reasons. The final three picks are all worth 10 points.

Give our latest DUDcast a listen below, and remember, if you’re actually paying to see a regular season game in today’s NBA, well, you’re an idiot…

Man, I have got to get this shit on iTunes…

Wait, there’s more: Milwaukee Vs. Los Angeles In The NLCS: A Closer, More Disgusting Look

You have got to see this shit:

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