by Tommy Gimler

With a nickname like “The Monkey God,” you know that Jarred Brooks is either a beast in the octagon or he cleans up monkey shit at the zoo at his day job.

Either way, The Monkey God put himself on the map with average MMA fans at UFC Utica last night, but it wasn’t because he beat the shit out of some poor bastard who lost his fantasy football league and was forced to sign up for the undercard at an upstate New York UFC show. Instead, Brooks knocked himself out when he went for what looked like it would have been an awesome finishing move on Jose Shorty Torres but didn’t quite execute it the way he drew it up on a Denny’s napkin or some shit.

Welcome to the UFC @ShortyTorres125!!
He gets the finish in round 2!#UFCUtica pic.twitter.com/reuP4QWzzq

— UFC (@ufc) June 1, 2018

Yeah, that blows. You’ve got that guy dead in his tracks and you knock yourself the fuck out instead. We’ve all been there in some way, shape or form.

Our guess is this is what somebody in Shorty Torres’s camp is saying right now:

Wait, there’s more: It Rained So Much At One College Baseball Regional That Players Were Swimming Laps In The Dugout

You have got to see this shit: