Brewers Pitcher Adrian Houser Barfed Twice Behind The Mound After Getting Called Up Sunday

puking brewers pitcher

by Tommy Gimler

Brewers manager Craig Counsell had never seen a pitcher puke on the diamond before Adrian Houser got him off the schneid Sunday afternoon at Miller Park.

Counsell made it clear after the game that Houser, who had just been recalled to the big league club from Colorado Springs Sunday morning, wasn’t under the weather despite the fact that he puked twice behind the pitcher’s mound.


“There wasn’t very much coming out. It wasn’t a food thing,” Counsell said after the Brewers dropped their second in a row to the Phillies. “For Adrian today, it was just kind of a combination of a bunch of factors. He wasn’t under the weather at all, but it was an early wake-up call, not enough food, heat, probably a little nerves from getting to the big leagues today.”

Here at the DUD, however, we’re not sure it was a factor of nerves or not enough food. Hell, it definitely wasn’t because of a lack of food. Nobody has that problem in Wisconsin. And this wasn’t the first time Houser has pitched in the bigs, so it couldn’t have been the nerves.

Was it the heat then? Well, maybe. Our sources tell us there wasn’t enough Gold Bond on the planet to handle the chafing caused by the heat index in Southeastern Wisconsin yesterday, so it’s definitely a possibility.

However, you cannot rule out that the Brewers might have hazed their boy Houser in his return to Milwaukee by making him shotgun a can of Milwaukee’s Best Ice upon entering the clubhouse. They’ve done studies, you know. 60 percent of the time, it makes you barf every time. I mean, BeerAdvocate gave it a 2.08 out of 5, which means it qualifies as a “poor” beer, for Christ’s sake.

We also can’t count out the fact that he drove past the BP on W. St. Paul Ave. on his way to the ballpark and saw that gas was up to $2.89 a gallon for the cheap shit. With the average family in Wisconsin dropping $127.39 a week at Culver’s, how in the hell are they supposed to afford a tank of gas to get to and from the tasty fast food chain four nights a week?

Ugh, just imagining that hell makes me want to vomit…

Wait, there’s more: Watch This CFL Player Pulverize A Drunk Fan On The Field

You have got to see this shit:

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