Would You Rather Get Drilled In The Testicles By A Foul Tip Or Have Your Groin Rip Off The Bone?

hyun-jin ryu injury

by Tommy Gimler

Or option three, would you rather be a woman?

It was a painful week around MLB, as stud pitchers Clayton Kershaw and Jacob deGrom both hit the DL with arm issues and Matt Harvey was DFA’d thanks to an inflamed vagina, but none of that came within a million miles of what happened to Cardinals catcher Yadier Molina and Dodgers pitcher Hyun-Jin Ryu, who hopefully weren’t planning on creating kids in 2018.

We showed you yesterday how Molina, whose neck ink should tell you that he’s one of the toughest guys in the league, took a tipped 101.5-MPH baseball to his giblets. It was so bad that he needed emergency surgery to take care of a traumatic hematoma, something that sounds worse than the Louisville Plugger.

As far as Ryu goes, this poor bastard is going to be out until after the All-Star break because his groin muscle…wait for it..completely tore off his bone while he was pitching against the Diamondbacks Wednesday night. Dodgers manager Dave Roberts said the injury was “traumatic” and “pretty dramatic,” something that would definitely fall under the “no shit” category.

Obviously, prayers go out to those two fellas and their manhood, but it got us thinking about which of those horrific injuries we would rather suffer if we were forced to choose one. It’s probably one of the toughest polls we’ve ever had. Good luck…

 

Wait, there’s more: Back By Popular Demand, Is This The Name Of A Kentucky Derby Horse Or An Urban Dictionary Entry?

You have got to see this shit:

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