Joel Embiid Will Be ‘The Phantom Of The Process’ During The NBA Postseason

joel embiid mask

by Tommy Gimler

I’ll be honest. It looks a hell of a lot better than the mask they gave Tom Cruise in Vanilla Sky.

vanilla sky mask

The Philadelphia 76ers have won 16 consecutive games heading into the franchise’s first postseason series since the 2011-12 season, and the news just keeps on getting better for the Philly faithful.

Joel Embiid, who hasn’t played since fucking up his face in Philly’s 118-101 win over the Knicks on March 29, has been fitted for a mask, and to say he looks like he’s ready to go is a bigger understatement than saying I would like to hold Kate Upton’s hand, as everybody knows I would eat a seven-layer salad out of her asshole, and I hate seven-layer salads.

I mean, look at this fucking guy:

I believe that is what the kids these days would say is “shit your pants awesome.”

Let’s just hope for Embiid’s sake that he looks a tad better under his mask than Cruise did:


Wait, there’s more: Only 974 People Showed Up To Watch The White Sox Lose To The Rays

You have got to see this shit:  

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