FAU Takes Safety With Eight Seconds Left And Totally Dicks Over Bettors Who Took Them -6.5

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by Tommy Gimler

Lane Kiffin has been delivering dick sandwiches to college football fans for years, but the one he served up to FAU bettors Friday night in their 30-25 win was one for the ages.

Up 14 points with less than six minutes to play, odds are you were already placing your order for a choice hooker if you laid a nickel on FAU to win by 6.5 points. I mean, even when the Marshall Thundering Herd made it a seven-point game with 5:16 to play, it really didn’t matter because you still had a winner albeit a half-point one at that.

And after Marshall threw a pick with less than two minutes left to play, it was pretty much a given that the score of 30-23 was going to be the one on the scoreboard when the final seconds ticked off. Instead, it was Dick Sandwich City, baby, as that shitdick Lane Kiffin told his punter on fourth down to run out of the back of the end zone for a safety despite the fact that there was still time left on the clock, so somebody was eventually going to have to kick to Marshall anyway.

Yeah, that’s pure dog shit right there, but not as pure as the shit Kiffin told reporters after the game, saying he “didn’t want to cover because of too much rat poison.”

Well, Mr. Kiffin, you can take your crappy joke and use it to go fuck yourself…  

Wait, there’s more: You have got to see this shit:  

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