Two Porn Stars Still Plan To Follow Through On Promise Of 500,000 Knob Jobs After Patriots Win Super Bowl

porn stars blow jobs patriots

by Frank Rhombus

‘Merica!

It’s 2017 in what used to be the greatest country on the planet, so nothing surprises us anymore, and yes, that includes two porn stars offering up a beej to every dude who followed them on Twitter before the Patriots took on the Falcons in Super Bowl 51.

Now for Lauren Phillips and Carmen Valentina to be on the hook for those knob jobs, the Patriots had to take care of business and bring home their fifth Lombardi trophy with the dreamy Tom Brady under center. With the Falcons up 28-3 in the third quarter, it looked as though I had a better chance of getting a handy from Amber Rose than that actually coming to fruition, but there is apparently nothing that Brady and company can’t do, as they rattled off 31 consecutive points to complete the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history.

Lost in the craziness of the game was the fact that these two “women” were now on the hook to play the skin flute for roughly 500,000 followers. Here’s what they had to say before the big game:

Sure, that seems like a fun thing, especially if you’re first in line. But with the possibly of 500,000 people showing up to cash in on the promise, you’d think there might have been just a hint of regret running through whatever is left of these young ladies’ brains.

Nope. Here are just some clips of what they had to say about it.

“I don’t care how many dicks show up,” said Valentina. “If [500,000 dicks] show up, we [will] spread the event over several days.”

While the name of event implies Team BJ is only for men, Valentina and Phillips want women to know they welcome. In fact, they’re encouraged.

“[I’ll] probably use a ball gag to work out those jaw muscles,” Valentina said about the weeks leading up to the event.

“It’s not gonna be rough,” Phillips said. “We’re like athletes. We build our bodies to take it. I’m used to a gangbang with five very well-endowed guys that I’m deep throating until tears come from my eyes.”

“Our goal is completion” for everyone, Phillips added.

Well, best of luck with your “goals,” girls. Of course if you’re planning on showing up for this and you find yourself somewhere after number 250,000 in line, you might want to think about purchasing some kind of insurance in case one of these “ladies” develops lockjaw…

Wait, there’s more: The Wild Ride That Was Super Bowl Week In Houston

You have got to see this shit:

What do you think? Leave a comment or subscribe to the RSS feed to have future articles delivered to your feed reader.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Image Description