Joel Embiid Wants To Be An All-Star Just So He Can Hump Rihanna


by Tommy Gimler

Don’t we all, buddy.

According to TMZ Sports, Philadelphia 76ers rookie center Joel Embiid has had a major crush on pop sensation Rihanna for quite some time now. In fact, when he first entered the Association, he hit her up on Twitter, and she apparently told him to “come back when he was an All Star.”

So obviously, Embiid is hoping to be selected to play in the NBA All-Star Game in New Orleans next month, and he’s using every form of media to tell people to vote for him so he can plow Rihanna.

Here he is on Twitter:

And here he is using his postgame interview as a platform to find his way inside Rihanna’s puss:

I’m a Kate Upton guy myself, but I totally get where Embiid is coming from with this. Hell, if Upton would have told me to come back after I murdered six cats, I would have decapitated 12 of those worthless fuckers in hopes that I could spend the night as well.

So hey, why not vote for the 22-year-old rookie sensation? His reason for wanting to be in New Orleans seems better than most, so let’s make his dream a reality. And let’s hope he videotapes it.

You can cast a vote for Embiid here. Best of luck, big guy…

Wait, there’s more: This Video Of A Bills Fan Slipping And Still Catching His Beer That Flew In The Air Is Hotter Than Two Girls Scissoring Each Other

You have got to see this shit:

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