R.I.P. Tristan Thompson’s Career Now That He And Khloe Kardashian Are Exclusive

khloe kardashian tristan thompson

by Frank Rhombus

Plowing a Kardashian is bad for your health. It’s science.

I mean, look at Lamar Odom, for Christ’s sake. Dude tried killing himself after crushing some Kardashian puss for a few years.

Remember Reggie Bush? Dude went into his relationship with Kim with a Heisman Trophy. Now he doesn’t have one. How unreal is that? O.J. Simpson murdered two people (allegedly), and he still has his. Or it’s stowed away in some dude’s safety deposit box or some shit. But the point is that “The Juice” didn’t have to forfeit his trophy, but Bush did, and it’s all because he fucked a Kardashian.

James Harden? Sure, he averaged a career-high 29 points per game last year, but he also set a career high in turnovers per game, had his lowest three-point field goal percentage since the 2010-11 season and finished with his lowest field goal percentage since the 2012-13 season. Plus, his Rockets were a bigger disappointment than those leaked nudie pics of Scarlett Johansson. In fact, Harden was so pig shit awful to begin the year that he literally cost Kevin McHale his job, and it was all because Khloe fucked him up something awful.

Odell Beckham? He’s all of a sudden a whiny bitch and below-average receiver, and he was reportedly humping Khloe in the offseason.

And the list goes on and on.

Well, it looks as though you can add Tristan Thompson to that list of poor bastards. Just watch him slowly fizzle out and become almost as irrelevant as Corey Feldman, as it’s being reported by Busted Coverage that Khloe (AKA “The Fat One”) is having her clothes shipped to Thompson’s house. Even worse for Thompson’s career? You guessed it: They’re fucking exclusive:

“Khloe and Tristan are doing really well. They are exclusive,” a source shared with E! News. “There is a lot of chemistry between the two of them and they are happy together.”

And just like that, Cavs chances to repeat as NBA champions just dropped from 50 percent to zero. Hell, they might not even win the East now. And it’s all because Tristan Thompson has put his own interests in front of the team’s and is plowing a Kardashian…

Wait, there’s more: How About This Poor Fucker From Wisconsin Who Was Stabbed 7 Times Because He Had A Vikings Inflatable In His Yard?

You have got to see this shit:

The unluckiest beer pong swat ever. Send your photos and videos to Instagram@totalfratmove.com

A video posted by Total Frat Move (@totalfratmove) on

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