Shit Of Holy, Bro! It Is Time To Take Peak At 2014 AFC Over/Unders, My Friend

raiders fans

by Rakesh the Intern

I’m telling you, bro. You take away severe public urination problem and fact that everyone in my extended family smell like bad cheese from goat, and the summer away from America here in Howrah really is not too much of problem, bro. And apparently this sports blog has yet to matter in lives of enough Americans, so it look like my boss will have me writing about betting on American football without paying of money to me for doing so, my friend.

So, it look like these thug in Vegas have release over/under win total for all 32 NFL team this year, and let me tell you something, bro, there are many easy pickings this year. It is like somebody is saying, “Hey Rakesh, go play a game of hoops with your cousin Gokul and if you beat him, I will give you 3,000 Rupee.” And listen, my friend, Gokul has a baby left hand and suck shit at hoops.

Anyway, bro, here is what I am thinking for this year’s AFC over/under win totals:

Oakland Raiders UNDER 5 wins

Check it out, bro. This division produce three playoff teams a year ago, and the Raiders were not one of them, my friend. Their 2014 opponents had .578 winning percentage last year, and Oakland is still same shit from pig team this year, bro. Somebody has to lose games in this division, and with Matt Schaub throwing passes to other team on weekly basis, this one could hit by Thanksgiving. Load and lock up with kid’s college fund, bro…

Buffalo Bills OVER 6.5 wins

Listen, bro. This one remind me of my dead Uncle Rishabh. He used to walk into Howrah billiards room and play like shit from pig for like 12 or 14 game, and then when nobody was expecting much from Rishabh, he would clean house and take every player’s money. This is how I feel about the Bills this year, my friend. I think AFC East is weaker than my cousin Palash, and he has AIDS, bro. There are also games on schedule against Browns, Raiders, Vikings, and Lions. Just hopefully after they win all their games they aren’t shot in back of their head like my Uncle Rishabh. Sad shit, bro, but fucking with guys at billiards room in Howrah is dangerous shit, my friend…

Pittsburgh Steelers OVER 8.5 wins

Check it out, bro. There are more cupcake on Pittsburgh’s schedule this year than on my Uncle Dinesh’s dinner plate. Fat shit, bro. The Steelers get two games against Cleveland, plus games against Tennessee, Jacksonville, Houston, the shit from pig Jets, and Tampa Bay. Plus they get teams like Indianapolis, New Orleans, and Kansas City at home. I’m telling you, bro. Unless their quarterback rape some girl again, this Steelers team could win 12 game this year, my friend…

Here are the rest of the over/under totals from the AFC. Good luck, bro…

New England Patriots – 10.5

Miami Dolphins – 8.5

New York Jets – 7

Buffalo Bills – 6.5

Indianapolis Colts – 9.5

Houston Texans – 7.5

Tennessee Titans – 7

Jacksonville Jaguars – 4.5

Cincinnati Bengals – 9

Pittsburgh Steelers – 8.5

Baltimore Ravens – 8.5

Cleveland Browns – 6.5

Denver Broncos – 11.5

Kansas City Chiefs – 8

San Diego Chargers – 8

Oakland Raiders – 5

What do you think, bro? Leave a comment or subscribe to the RSS feed to have future articles delivered to your feed reader.

4 Responses to Shit Of Holy, Bro! It Is Time To Take Peak At 2014 AFC Over/Unders, My Friend

  1. Haywood Jablomey says:

    Hey, you got the number of the hog, in the Putzberg Stealerz jersey? A buddy of mine has a cousin, who caught an extra chromo, and he’d love to make jet noises between her thighs.

    • tgim says:

      While that sounds like a hell of a time albeit a hell of a risk, we unfortunately don’t have any contact info for her.

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