Adam Feuerberg’s Weekly Report Of Two Teams The Rest Of Us Could Give Two Shits About

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by Adam Feuerberg

So after three weeks of disarray, I’ve managed to squeeze two straight weeks of triumph into my football life. Christ, I say that like I had something to do with it.

Well, one time I think I did. I was smoking way too much weed one afternoon watching football so I figured I’d grab the PlayStation remote and play the real football game that was happening on TV. I was the Cowboys; I won, just like they did on Thanksgiving, wearing their cursed blue jerseys at home, no less!
I couldn’t believe it! Since the late 1960′s, everyone knows that the Cowboys’ blue uniforms are cursed. The tradition of wearing the white uniforms at home was more of an aesthetic decision by former GM Tex Schramm who wanted to see the other teams visiting the Cotton Bowl wearing their colors rather than just seeing blue and white every week.

The curse of the blue jerseys started in a huge upset loss to the Cleveland Browns in the 1968 playoffs, and then solidified again after another horrible loss to the Baltimore Colts in Super Bowl V. Both teams at the time chose to wear their white jerseys at home knowing the Cowboys normally do not do so, thus establishing an odd but rather historic curse that’s repeated many times over.

This was no different at kickoff on Thanksgiving day, when rookie Terrence Williams (who is having a good season by the way) FUMBLED THE OPENING KICKOFF and the visiting Raiders returned it for a touchdown. My first reaction was a simple yikes, followed by the acceptance that the jersey is in fact cursed, and the game was lost.
As play progressed, the Cowboys turned things around and won the game, 31-24. They let the Raiders beat the spread, set at 9.5, but they won. What do I care about degenerate gamblers, anyway? The most important thing here is that the blue jersey curse is broken, supposedly at least. The Raiders aren’t exactly one of the best teams this season, but the Cowboys have a knack for staying with great teams and not showing up against mediocre ones, so hopefully this victory means more than just a fashion statement.
Okay, we’re done with the Cowboys this week. They’ve won two in a row, are in first place in the NFC East (not saying much at 7-5, but first place is first place), and are undefeated in said division.

Now, we close this week with a short recap of the Miami Hurricanes 2013 season. The team won 9 games for the first time since 2009, but that they still haven’t won a bowl game since 2006, against Nevada in the, yes, MPC Computers Bowl. With a name like that, you’d think it was a joke in a movie like The Waterboy, but no, it’s real, and it’s the last meaningful postseason victory for the once very proud collegiate club to which my allegiance belongs.

Now, I’m not saying that I’m not proud of the team; they had a good year, minus the three slaughterings brought on by the hated Seminoles, Hokies, and Blue Devils (yeah they’re good this year; they’re in the ACC Title Game), but I would be willing to place all the marbles in their unannounced bowl game as a true test of grit. There’s no conference championship to play for, so now it’s just this game and a potential 10-win season before a long offseason after which the Canes could be placed in the Top 25 again if they look like they want to be there. Of course, it’s unfair to place every ounce of importance in this game, but I just want to see my Canes win. And win they shall, or else it’ll be another long spring of baseball and what ifs.

So, what did you think of this week’s uneducated ramblings? Leave a comment below and let us know what you think. Thanks for reading!

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One Response to Adam Feuerberg’s Weekly Report Of Two Teams The Rest Of Us Could Give Two Shits About

  1. Perly says:

    I love this guy and he needs to write for the site more often!

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