Rickie Weeks Done For Season After Proving He Is Worst, Dumbest Fucking Player In Baseball

rickie weeks injury

by Tommy Gimler

Our days of sticking up for this pile of pig shit are over. Even B.J. Upton, Dan Uggla, and Adam Dunn wouldn’t do what Rickie Weeks did to himself Wednesday night.

With the Brewers leading the Giants 2-1 in the top of the 8th inning, Weeks hit a weak ground ball to third. We’re assuming most Brewers fans were thrilled at first since Weeks actually made contact, but then…

Watch Rickie Weeks Bring An End To His Shitty Little Season

Well, on a side note, it’s nice to see Yuniesky Betancourt at the 37-second mark trying to distract Brewers fans from his poor play on the field by sporting a mohawk.

Special thanks to DUD faithful Brian Portz (or shout out or #BrianPortz or whatever in the hell the kids are saying these days) for sending us the tip. We missed this one, as watching two last place baseball teams in their respective divisions falls somewhere between sticking a Phillips head screwdriver up our peeholes and hitting on dudes these days.

For Weeks, it’s a fitting end to a brutal fucking season. Spending a day on a couch made of syphilis watching R.I.P.D. and White House Down doesn’t even come close to describing how bad it’s been:

1) Only Atlanta’s Dan Uggla has a worse batting average among qualified NL batters than Weeks’ .209 mark.

2) His .306 OBP is the tenth-worst mark in the NL.

3) His 105 strikeouts are the tenth-most in the National League.

4) Among qualified NL hitters, only Eric Young Jr. and Marco Scutaro have fewer RBI than Weeks (24).

5) The ninth-worst slugging percentage in the National League belongs to Rickie Weeks.

6) Only Uggla has fewer hits among qualified NL hitters than Weeks’ 73.

7) Weeks has grounded into 13 double plays, the tenth-highest total in the National League.

If Brewers fans are looking at things with a glass half full kind of mindset right now, they shouldn’t be. It could get a lot worse. I mean, Rickie Weeks could stay healthy and be shitty in all 162 games next year…

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