by Tommy Gimler
Tomorrow, for the first time since Week 13 in the 2010 season, the #1 team in the BCS will not be from the SEC, and that’s a great thing for college football.
But before we start sucking each other’s dicks, believe me, the powers that be will try everything in their power to make sure that a team from that conference will be playing on January 7th, and that is a damn shame.
Here’s how the BCS Standings will look tomorrow night. Don’t bother wasting your time or chancing missing any part the Bears/Texans game. Or maybe give your fat wife some attention for once. Here is how it will look:
1) Kansas State
3) Notre Dame
8 ) South Carolina
9) Florida State
And if you don’t think Texas A&M will be sniffing Oklahoma’s ass at 11 or 12 after upsetting Alabama even though they have two losses, think again.
And therein lies the problem with these standings. They’re bull shit. For starters, how can not one person know what these computers are using as a formula to determine their rankings? Personally, I think it’s pretty obvious. It’s called the “because you’re in the SEC, you’re in the Top 10″ formula.
Never mind the fact that you have two losses (Florida, LSU, South Carolina). Or that you only beat Auburn, one of the worst teams in the FBS, by only two points (LSU). Or that you average only 19 points a game (LSU). Or that you needed a punt block with two seconds left (Florida) to beat Louisiana-Lafayette, who just sounds like a squad that doesn’t graduate 60% its players. Or that after you got smoked by 33 points by Florida, you defeat a Tennessee team without a conference win, in your house, mind you, by only three points (South Carolina). For fuck’s sake, Florida, LSU, South Carolina, and Texas A&M aren’t even going to the SEC Championship Game, yet they’re considered by these rankings to have more of a shot at the BCS Championship Game than a few one-loss teams from another major conference?
For example, why is a one-loss team like Florida State ranked below three two-loss teams from the SEC? FSU’s only loss came on 4th down with only 16 seconds left on the road to a NC State squad who is 6-4 on the season and 3-3 in the ACC. It’s not like they totally dropped the ball at home against Eastern Michigan, Colorado, or the Royal National College for the Blind. It was a decent albeit not top notch team in a conference game on the road. While we’re at it, why is Clemson not ranked above those three two-loss squads? All they’ve done since losing a tough game on the road to Florida State is beat down their competition worse than an innocent wife in Wisconsin after the Packers lose.
Hopefully Kansas State, Oregon, and Notre Dame win out so there won’t be any doubt that an SEC team doesn’t belong in this year’s BCS Championship. I guess at the very least, I can live with the satisfaction that not a single SEC fan will be upset with this post because odds are that none of them can read it…