I think the only people who enjoyed last night’s replacement refs’ performance were the zebras these scabs were replacing.
I’m sure Ed Hochuli was running around his Phoenix mansion in just his skivvies making the “cha-ching” sign with his 30-inch biceps after “refs” in the Eagles-Steelers game called Philly’s Mardy Gilyard out of bounds as he took out the pylon. The play would be ruled a touchdown after a video replay showed he obviously scored.
Or how about that scab Craig Ochoa telling fans “Arizona will be not charged a timeout.” No shit, Craig. That’s because Arizona isn’t playing in this game between Atlanta and Baltimore. Ochoa would make the same mistake later in the game on another challenge. I’m sure Mike Carey lit up a fresh dog turd after those blunders.
In Denver, scab Robert Frazer called a snap infraction…on the right guard. In San Diego, Green Bay Packers’ rookie linebacker Nick Perry was called for unsportsmanlike conduct for your usual celebration of taking down the opposing team’s quarterback. In the same game, there was yet another blunder: a woman was dressed up as a line judge.
But as awful as all of that was, nothing came close to what took place in Buffalo in the Bills-Redskins game.
With just over three minutes left in the first quarter, Bills punter Brian Moorman booted a terrific ball that was caught and downed by Bills’ WR Ruvell Martin near Washington’s 5-yard line. No word yet as to whether these refs came from the XFL or if they were just high as fuck, but they called that a touchback.
Only after a challenge flag was thrown by Bills’ coach Chan Gailey did we learn that these dipshits thought the ball was touched in the end zone. Even the Redskins’ announcers would acknowledge that it meant every official was watching something else other than the ball.
I know it’s the preseason, and what happens in the preseason doesn’t matter unless your starting running back breaks his collarbone on your team’s first play from scrimmage (ahem, Ryan Matthews, ahem, pussy), but there were more mistakes in last night’s action than there are in a Flint, MI hospital’s delivery room over one calendar year. And when refs make mistakes, they affect the outcomes of games. That can’t happen. In the NBA? Sure. It’s a fixed game. But not in the NFL.
C’mon meow, Roger. Pay Hocules and his boys their money…