Oklahoma City guard James Harden hit a seemingly meaningless three-pointer as time expired in Game 1 of the Western Conference Finals against the San Antonio Spurs tonight. Well, unless you had the Spurs at minus 5.5 points.
The Spurs led by as many as 10 with 1:57 left in the game. Hell, they led by 6 with just three seconds left. That’s a cover, bitch! Light up the cigar and tell your wife you’re going out for some tits. But then, in what could be the worst bad beat of the 2011-12 NBA season, Harden chucks up a three ball instead of just handing the ball to a zebra. No money. No cigar. No tits. Just you with your remote in one hand and dick in the other.
But if you think this was a bad beat, check this one out.
November 19, 2011. Boise State goes into San Diego State as 19.5 point favorites. Up 45-14 to start the 4th quarter, I’m already shoving five-dollar bills down my neighbor’s daughter’s shirt, and why not? Up 31 points, it would take two Aztec touchdowns to ruin my Saturday night.
14 minutes, 45 seconds later, I’m still OK, but just barely. The Aztecs have driven down all the way to the Boise State 1, and they are only down 23. But wait! The Broncos stuff the run, and the Aztecs will run out of time. Unless they call a timeout with 15 seconds left down 23 points. And that is exactly what happened. San Diego State threw for a touchdown on the very next play, I fell from 2nd place to the cellar in my betting league, and my neighbor’s daughter hasn’t talked to me since…